So how have you been? I've been here all along just formulating what to say next. It's like that person you were texting constantly and then you just dropped off and they are wondering should I be pissed off at them for ghosting me or should I be worried that they might be dead and call the police? Well there has been a lot going on in my life and I have just been trying to find that right balance to get my act together, more on that later. Right now I'm going to try and recap my last half marathon race that happened over MLK weekend Jan. 15
My BFF and I had decided it had been way too long since we got together for a solo girls trip (2 years ago at the Nantucket Half) I convinced her to go with me to help me celebrate my birthday even though she hasn't been able to run lately. Turns out I REALLY REALLY needed a vacation! The first thing we did was rent a ridiculously bright yellow car when we flew in to San Diego then we drove to Carlsbad to check in to the hotel. We of course had to go check out the beach and then have lunch with drinks because as mom's who's sons are only 2 days apart when the heck to we ever have a drink with lunch!?!?!!! Ok ok maybe that one time when... no really, NEVER! Then because we are very driven women who can't seem to manage to sit still for very long we started looking what adventures we would be signing up for that weekend of course all while having to take some work calls and emails because heaven forbid they let us forget that we do have responsibilities at home.
Of course the best way in my opinion to see a new city is always a bike tour! But may not have been the best decision to do a 3 hour bike/walk tour the day before my half marathon. We saw so much in that amount of time and with a cool group of people. But I was so exhausted by the time we were done!!! 
Race morning came fast! I checked the weather and decided to go with shorts and a t-shirt because I always regret wearing too much. One girl in the lobby whispered to her friend "she's wearing shorts!" why yes I am and you know I can hear you! Remember I've been running in the snow so 45 degrees in the humidity warming up to around 60 was HOT! Turns out I was the only one not wearing long sleeved something but I didn't regret it one bit. It was hot and muggy and I almost wanted to take my t shirt off at one point and run in my sports bra but not that brave yet, working on it. Thank goodness I stayed at a participating hotel because the race sent shuttles to get us and it was so easy. With the road closures and over 6,000 people I don't know how I would have gotten there other wise!
As I lined up at the start in coral 3 I noticed the 2:00 pacer was next to me. I thought, why not? I mean I hadn't been training as much as I wanted to and I've never come close to breaking 2 hours but hey I was at sea level and I've lately found this new level of pain tolerance I didn't know I had. So maybe this will be the day! I got really excited with all the people around cheering and the bands. It was a little crowded to start and lost a shoe but luckily I have stretchy laces so I just slipped it back on. There is a debate as to whether it's a flat fast course or rolling hills. I say there are definitely some rolling hills. But luckily where I train there are big hills. I just thought I may not break 2 like I thought. But I kept up with the group until about mile 5 when I became very sore in my hamstring, quads and calves (cursing myself for that fun bike tour the day before). I lost sight of them by about mile 6 or 7. But at the turn around something kicked in inside of me that I can't explain. Something woke up! First I was angry because I thought why the heck am I out here, it's definitely not to give up or feel defeated. I'm also away from my son and if I'm going to spend time away from him to race then I sure as hell better make it count! I thought to myself yes I know I want it but HOW BAD DO I WANT IT? I want it really bad! I want to be proud of myself and break a goal I never thought possible. I want my son to know his mom is tough and strong. So I sucked it up and pushed past the pain and kicked it up a notch. I kept seeing the little 2:00 sign bop up and down and I knew I could catch it! Then at one point I saw a table offering beer and I thought why not the last time I broke a PR at a half I had drank some beer thinking I had picked up water maybe there's something behind that. :-)
Then when I thought I still had 4 miles left and started to feel the pain again and almost lost heart this random guy comes up next to me and says "If you can give me 2 8:30 miles you'll break 2 hours. Relax your shoulders, take a deep breath and do it!" I was so excited that we only had 2 miles left not 4?!?!!! I hadn't worn my garmin and sometimes it was crowded enough that I missed the mile marker signs. I was so excited I really pushed forward. At one point I saw a guy that was about to pass out and he was pushing one of the Team Hoyt wheelchairs. I knew I couldn't catch him by myself so luckily when I yelled 3 guys came to catch him and someone else yelled the medics are coming. So I thought ok I can still do this! I passed the 2:00 hour pacer in the home stretch and came in at 1:59!!!!!! And I had a negative split for the first time in a half marathon!!! I was so happy but had no one to share it with so I sat down and cried overwhelming tears of joy!! I got a few weird looks but I was just so happy. And it was like all the a bad stuff that had happened the year before just left my body in that moment and it was such a cathartic moment for me that I didn't care what anyone thought! I felt so alive and I can't wait to see what other barriers I'm going to break this year.
I finished the weekend off with an awesome kayaking tour and saw sea lions and dolphins and swam in the ocean to test out my new wet suit in 52 degree water and it was awesome. So if you need to get away I highly recommend grabbing your best friend and going! I'm glad I had her along to make me laugh, even if she didn't see me race ;-) she was there in spirit! I was happy to come home to a smiling toddler that was just as happy to have me back and he was super excited to wear my new finisher's medal. He didn't understand my excitement about my finish time but he will one day. They are always watching! :-)
